Day 4: Someone I Have Always Wanted To Meet And…UGH!

You know, I have wracked my brain on this one. You would think since I picked the questions I would pick ones I knew my answer to already. WHAT was I thinking? Lol I will give a shout out to my friend Rosemary in Australia. I would LOVE to meet her and hopefully one day, that will happen. For now though, I am thankful for the interweb so we can stay in touch. I love her muchly!!

There is only one other thing that comes to my mind regarding this, and that is: another question. I LOVE musicals. Right from the time I was a little kid, I always wished that life was like a musical in the sense that we would sing to each other. I know some of you are way better singers than some of us but if it was a “norm” would we even notice that in that respect? I wouldn’t want to take away from amazing singers but it wouldn’t have to. Singing would be talking and better singers could still do it for a living. The only that would change was every once in a while we would break into song. Yes, I’m a dork.

I’m afraid I don’t have tonnes of inspiration today, even to just sit here and write. It’s a beautiful day but I sense depression on my doorstep. I always know when it is there and as it comes closer so I know now is the time to fight it unless  I’m too late and it comes in. Being in a depression state isn’t the worse thing ( anxiety is WAY worse IMHO). Sometimes I even welcome it like an old friend. It’s so weird. I hate depression yet sometimes I love it. I guess in a way it has become natural. It has become a natural state and when I’m not depressed I sometimes am even lost because it feels so unnatural to me. Depression is different for everyone and where some people ( a lot of people actually ) have chosen to poeticize it, I choose not to because I don’t believe depression deserves that. Just because I welcome it ( sometimes )and just because we talk about it more and “accept“ it, I still believe that, like cancer, it isn’t a normal and natural state. We don’t poeticize cancer, in fact, we HATE cancer. I hate depression and in my mind, in my own body, in my own state, I see it as a weakness in me. I don’t feel that way about others, but I see a weakness and fear in me and the result is depression. Friends, this is my personal opinion on my own depression. There is nothing that annoys me more than when I see the lists of things to do “when you are depressed.“ HELLO. Depression takes so much away including a desire to even get better. Even to learn all that ahead of time, it just doesn’t work. The hardest thing to do when you are depressed is to take that “next step.“ But you know what, that is the only thing I can do and sometimes that next step is just getting out of bed.

Anyway, I’m not sure where that came from. I guess I went with it. I have an appointment tomorrow and I imagine I might feel better or worse after it. I will just repeat to myself that I will not judge myself on my health and the things I don’t do right with it. I will just do better next time.

Toodles friends! Have an amazing day! I loves you!

My Tribute to Judy: Toronto Blue Jays

I’ll admit I am not a baseball fan.  I have watched it when someone else had it on but I don’t follow it.  I much prefer hockey ( GO OILERS…WOOHOO).  BUT…this year I am going to follow the Toronto Blue Jays.  It will be sort of a tribute type thing to me.  A way for me to remember my friend, Judy, who passed away March 3 of cancer.  She was a HUGE Blue Jays fan.  So I may not be as huge of a fan as Judy was and I won’t even touch my mom and her love for the Jays but I will watch it ( ok I don’t have a TV).  I will remember the games we watched together while she was sick, and the lessons she taught me about baseball.

Judy…you have GREAT seats this year!  Love you my dear friend.  I will see you again.  ❤

 

GO JAYS GO!  I Loves you friends!

Day 3: Bucket List?

Bucket List? Nope! Don’t have one and don’t want one. I know they are popular to have. I understand there are things that people want to do in their lives before they die or get too old to do them ( or however they see their bucket list). I am kind of boring. I have no desire to travel anywhere really. I am a homebody with anxiety issues. Home is good. Home is safe. Safe is necessary. Even as time goes on and my anxiety gets better, I have grown used to going with the spirit and seeing where I go and where I end up. Whether it be the Dollar store or the Grocery Store…the Hardware Store or the Bakery. Get my drift?

In saying all this, I know that people put more than just travelling on their bucket list. The way I see life right now, is in the moment. Right now, what can I be doing? I have choices to make and I will make them and life will take me to the next step. I guess in a nut shell what my goal in living life is living it so I don’t have regrets. I try to make the right decisions. I know I will make wrong ones but to live in regret is living in the past. I struggle with that as it is.

This is what I wrote in day 2:

God is good and He has me on an amazing journey that will take me places I can’t even dream about. If I can dream about it, I don’t even want to go there which might give you a clue as far as tomorrow goes and my next topic.” hint hint!”

The truth is I quit dreaming several years ago. I was in a bad spot with my depression and things weren’t going so well between my husband and I. His drinking had really drained me and I let it. There is so much more to that and maybe in future blogs I will share more about it. But…nonetheless, I was in a bad place. All I wanted to do was write and I couldn’t even do that. Nothing came and nothing had come for years before that. I knew I wanted to write, but I couldn’t and yet, I still called myself a writer. Cray Cray! I gave up. I gave up my only dream and that was writing. I gave it to God and said, “whatever…do what you want with this. I’m done.” And I quit.

My youngest son has a Bucket List. I think it’s a great idea in many respects. He gets quite excited about it and keeps adding things to it. I would never discourage that, ever. It is also a great way of keeping track of your dreams and hopes (maybe that’s what a Bucket List is). It’s easy to forget some of these things as we go on through life’s journey.

I haven’t started dreaming again yet, but I have started writing and for now, that is all I need for now. For me, they are a “ two in one deal!”

Keep Dreaming Friends! I Loves you!

Day 2: Basic Things About MOI!

What can I say? My name is Alexis Plett. Married to my guy for 22 years in June ( wowsers)! We have two awesome boys who are 20 and 17. I won’t mention any names, Not now anyway. 🙂

That’s it! HA! That is definitely NOT 500 words. My identity has been wrapped around my kids and husband ,so to be honest, I don’t know ME very well. I have been on a quest to get to know me. A big part of my quest is understanding who I am in Christ. My faith is very important to me and I have had a major paradigm shift in the last couple years, especially. Luckily my husband is on the journey with me so we are together….but ALONE in many ways. It’s interesting. Something happens to Evangelical Christians when you tell them that GOD loves everyone and that Jesus died for everyone. I won’t get into that right now. I don’t want to make this about that right now, but we seem to be losing some friends over this new belief ( this new belief to US). It’s cray cray. So yes…I am trying to find out who this Alexis person is. When I know, I will introduce you

What do I love? Smart Food White Cheddar Popcorn, Pepsi Max and Hairspray Live. I am to the point that I will watch Hairspray Live after everyone is in bed so they don’t know or bug me about it. My family sometimes think I am crazy mad and maybe I am. I am sure I have seen the movie a million times. The same with Mamma Mia, Grease Live and Julie & Julia. I have been like this as far as I can remember. I remember when the song Life is a Highway by Tom Cochran came out. I played that song to death. I remember my roommates were ready to kill me. Lol I’m like that with foods too. I few years ago I was on a chicken fingers wrapped in a tortilla kick. That’s all I ate for a long time. It’s no wonder my youngest son has some of those qualities too. It sounds so weird. I sound weird.

My husband and I are both turning 49 this year. Yikes. Nervous I am. It sounds so old to me. I mean, for me to be that old, not others. I can hardly even believe it. Where has the time gone and what do I have to show for it. In some ways, I have lots…mainly my amazing boys. In some ways I have nothing…who am I? I don’t even know me! In some ways, why does it even matter… God is good and He has me on an amazing journey that will take me places I can’t even dream about. If I can dream about it, I don’t even want to go there which might give you a clue as far as tomorrow goes and my next topic. ” hint hint!”

Dream big friends! I loves you!

Day 1: Introduction to the Challenge

Day 1 for Camp NaNoWriMo

For this month I am blogging. My goal is to blog daily for the whole month of April. I also hope to blog at least 500 words per post and I am following a “list” that you can see in this post. 🙂 It is a list that I made up taking ideas off of other lists because to be honest, I love lists! One thing that I do not love though is long blogs so I am curious to see just how long 500 words is. I lose focus easy (  it seems ) so unless I am reading a book, I shy away from blogs that look long. Ok, if there are pictures in it and if I know you or have loved something else you have written, then, I “may” read a long blog. As a rule though, I don’t.

There are a few reasons that I chose to do Camp NaNoWrMo and actually I think that is a question for later in the month but I will share a reason now as well. Feb and March I did monthly Challenges. I did The Minimalism Game. It was good for me to be focused on something like that for the month and that is why I am here. I want to step up my game for writing ( and making sure I write daily). Some days are hard for me to write because of my depression. Even when I have something to say, I just can’t put it on paper ( or my screen). It’s a struggle but it’s life. I am hoping that I will be able to stay focused enough on writing everyday for this challenge that I can break through the depression. That’s my goal anyway.

I was filled with joy weeks ago that my writing seemed to have been revived once I quit Facebook. I am so so happy to say that it is still the case. I have had writers block literally for years. Which brings me up another reason I am here…to celebrate! My time for writing has come. My kids don’t need me hovering over them anymore and well, my husband…he does but one out of three isn’t bad. Lol

Camp NaNoWriMo is an extension from November’s NaNoWriMo. I believe there are two Camps; one in April and one in July. They encourage not only novels but other projects as well. I didn’t see where they had blogging listed but I thought that was what I wanted to do because that is what I am writing right now. It makes sense.

So here I am, Day 1 and almost 500 words ( 441 as of the first bracket). Good to know how long 500 words is. I know I can so this all month and I will, as well as other blogging as I so see fit.

Friends, have a wonderful April 1 ( and that is no joke!)

Do something that excites you today!!!! Make your inner child laugh. I loves you!