Personal Space: Writing Prompt

Personal space:

To what extent is your blog a place for your own self-expression and creativity vs. a site designed to attract readers? How do you balance that? If sticking to certain topics and types of posts meant your readership would triple, would you do it?

I love this question. I will admit, I like the idea of people following my blog. If I didn’t I would write a journal or a diary. Obviously, in my own mind, I would like to think that I am not the only one that struggles with the issues I struggle with and just simply try to live life in and among the chaos of life and this world we live in. So far on my blog, I have been somewhat transparent about some things but I am hoping as time goes on I will be able to do that more. Not for the readers so much, but for me in my own healing of my past.

Also, as my faith and spiritual life are deconstructing and reconstructing with the new and amazing, I would love to share that kind of stuff too but fear will hold me back because I know some (most)  of my evangelical friends will not understand and think I am going bonkers. Yes, fear still has a hold on me in areas but I am learning that it takes time for some of this stuff to change in me.

Since this blog is still kind of new, I’m still not sure what I want of it and how I want it to evolve. I guess all I can do is be me and just continue writing the way I write and share as I see fit.

I love the last question: If sticking to certain topics and types of posts meant your readership would triple, would you do it? I would not do it if the topics did not define who I was. As much as I like numbers of who follows my blog (I think I am at 33…THANK YOU!) I don’t think I would be able to sacrifice me, my beliefs JUST for a bigger readership. I use this blog to work things out in my own mind too. My thinking is maybe someone else is there too.

As a summary, I don’t know where this blog will go. I don’t know what it will become and I don’t even know who it is for, really. I have it because I want to write and as I write I learn and as I learn I write ( sometimes ). I say sometimes because I have problems writing things I don’t totally understand because my words don’t come out very good. Since I write the way I think, it sounds all muddled and stuff. Maybe I will get the nerve to eventually share and write more of what I am learning right now, but for now, I will go on a day by day basis. Every once in a while an idea hits me for a blog post ( I write it in my book). This one is a prompt and it nudged me to think. I like that.

Hopefully, you can make your way through this and understand. If not, I’m sorry. My mind is muddled and guess what, it’s quite normal for me! I loves you!

Day 13: Why Do I Blog

Why do I blog? I started in 2007 or 2008. I actually don’t remember why I started blogging but I do remember why I stopped blogging. Facebook.

First of all, I was on it too much to even take time out to write. The times I did take time out I didn’t have anything to say or I would be drawn back in. I guess it isn’t Facebook (itself) fault as much as it was my fault and the way I saw, used and was affected by it.

I think in the beginning I just wanted to write and share. I have always liked writing and what a fine way to portray that; to act that out, than to have a blog. I never had a huge following but I thought what I had to say had some merit. In the years since I started one that whole merit thingy idea has fluctuated, depending on where I was in life and what was going on and where I was with my depression.

I never went longer than a few months without blogging but I definitely didn’t do much in the last few years. There was something almost therapeutic when I deleted my Laundry Queen Blog and started this one. It was like a new beginning to me. I am in a new and different place in life now so it seemed like a change was necessary PLUS my title came from all the laundry I had to do with our family of four, now I only do it for my husband and me. KA CHING! THAT is another perk of your kids growing up! 🙂

I call myself a writer because I write, not because of the way I write. I tend to compare myself to others and I see such professionalism in the way some people write. I write the way I talk and think. If I was to write down my thoughts, well, I guess I am. 🙂 These are the same words I think. Interestingly enough, my son writes the same way. I was I little concerned when we sent our homeschool facilitator his short story. I thought it was fantastic, quite outstanding actually. When we handed it in I was thinking of some writing projects I did in grade 12 that weren’t that well accepted because of the style. My teacher did comment though that I was a good writer with a good imagination (though, I haven’t done much writing in fiction since). Anyway, our facilitator loved my son’s story. He was thrilled.

I blog now because I love to write.

I blog now because the words are coming and I want to type them while I can and while they are there. I blog now because it brings me joy and makes me happy.

I blog now because this is the first time in years and years and years that I have felt this good and I want to take advantage of every moment that I have.

I blog now because I am doing something for me; something therapeutic that is bringing healing to my life and I know I still have a ways to go to complete healing, but in that process, I have found something that I had never had before and that is a piece of who Alexis truly is.

That is why I blog.

All the Glory goes to God ❤

Have a Terrific Thursday! I loves you!

Day 9: The Meaning Behind My Blog Name

Interestingly enough, someone asked me about that last week. I am afraid it isn’t a very interesting answer. The truth of the matter is that I have had this blog for approximately 4 years now but I have never blogged on it. I had been using Blogger for years and I actually just deleted it last week. I made the blog with WordPress around the same time I made a Tumblr account and they were both made with the intent of finding a way to deal with my depression through writing. Wordly Random was a name I chose because it gave me permission to write about anything I wanted. Random words. There is a psychology to it that obviously didn’t work for me otherwise I would have used it. lol I guess I found it hard switching over from Blogger plus I was a little intimidated with getting started and learning something new. Now that I look back, I see that I was majorly damaged in the fact that I wasn’t even able to write. Maybe what I had to say back then didn’t matter? I still don’t think what I have to say matters to anyone else. I do all my writing for me now and I give God all the glory. If anyone is blessed or just plain impressed by anything I have to share, that to me is a BONUS!  ♥

That is my story and I am sticking to it!

Happy Sunday! I loves you!

Day 4: Someone I Have Always Wanted To Meet And…UGH!

You know, I have wracked my brain on this one. You would think since I picked the questions I would pick ones I knew my answer to already. WHAT was I thinking? Lol I will give a shout out to my friend Rosemary in Australia. I would LOVE to meet her and hopefully one day, that will happen. For now though, I am thankful for the interweb so we can stay in touch. I love her muchly!!

There is only one other thing that comes to my mind regarding this, and that is: another question. I LOVE musicals. Right from the time I was a little kid, I always wished that life was like a musical in the sense that we would sing to each other. I know some of you are way better singers than some of us but if it was a “norm” would we even notice that in that respect? I wouldn’t want to take away from amazing singers but it wouldn’t have to. Singing would be talking and better singers could still do it for a living. The only that would change was every once in a while we would break into song. Yes, I’m a dork.

I’m afraid I don’t have tonnes of inspiration today, even to just sit here and write. It’s a beautiful day but I sense depression on my doorstep. I always know when it is there and as it comes closer so I know now is the time to fight it unless  I’m too late and it comes in. Being in a depression state isn’t the worse thing ( anxiety is WAY worse IMHO). Sometimes I even welcome it like an old friend. It’s so weird. I hate depression yet sometimes I love it. I guess in a way it has become natural. It has become a natural state and when I’m not depressed I sometimes am even lost because it feels so unnatural to me. Depression is different for everyone and where some people ( a lot of people actually ) have chosen to poeticize it, I choose not to because I don’t believe depression deserves that. Just because I welcome it ( sometimes )and just because we talk about it more and “accept“ it, I still believe that, like cancer, it isn’t a normal and natural state. We don’t poeticize cancer, in fact, we HATE cancer. I hate depression and in my mind, in my own body, in my own state, I see it as a weakness in me. I don’t feel that way about others, but I see a weakness and fear in me and the result is depression. Friends, this is my personal opinion on my own depression. There is nothing that annoys me more than when I see the lists of things to do “when you are depressed.“ HELLO. Depression takes so much away including a desire to even get better. Even to learn all that ahead of time, it just doesn’t work. The hardest thing to do when you are depressed is to take that “next step.“ But you know what, that is the only thing I can do and sometimes that next step is just getting out of bed.

Anyway, I’m not sure where that came from. I guess I went with it. I have an appointment tomorrow and I imagine I might feel better or worse after it. I will just repeat to myself that I will not judge myself on my health and the things I don’t do right with it. I will just do better next time.

Toodles friends! Have an amazing day! I loves you!

Day 3: Bucket List?

Bucket List? Nope! Don’t have one and don’t want one. I know they are popular to have. I understand there are things that people want to do in their lives before they die or get too old to do them ( or however they see their bucket list). I am kind of boring. I have no desire to travel anywhere really. I am a homebody with anxiety issues. Home is good. Home is safe. Safe is necessary. Even as time goes on and my anxiety gets better, I have grown used to going with the spirit and seeing where I go and where I end up. Whether it be the Dollar store or the Grocery Store…the Hardware Store or the Bakery. Get my drift?

In saying all this, I know that people put more than just travelling on their bucket list. The way I see life right now, is in the moment. Right now, what can I be doing? I have choices to make and I will make them and life will take me to the next step. I guess in a nut shell what my goal in living life is living it so I don’t have regrets. I try to make the right decisions. I know I will make wrong ones but to live in regret is living in the past. I struggle with that as it is.

This is what I wrote in day 2:

God is good and He has me on an amazing journey that will take me places I can’t even dream about. If I can dream about it, I don’t even want to go there which might give you a clue as far as tomorrow goes and my next topic.” hint hint!”

The truth is I quit dreaming several years ago. I was in a bad spot with my depression and things weren’t going so well between my husband and I. His drinking had really drained me and I let it. There is so much more to that and maybe in future blogs I will share more about it. But…nonetheless, I was in a bad place. All I wanted to do was write and I couldn’t even do that. Nothing came and nothing had come for years before that. I knew I wanted to write, but I couldn’t and yet, I still called myself a writer. Cray Cray! I gave up. I gave up my only dream and that was writing. I gave it to God and said, “whatever…do what you want with this. I’m done.” And I quit.

My youngest son has a Bucket List. I think it’s a great idea in many respects. He gets quite excited about it and keeps adding things to it. I would never discourage that, ever. It is also a great way of keeping track of your dreams and hopes (maybe that’s what a Bucket List is). It’s easy to forget some of these things as we go on through life’s journey.

I haven’t started dreaming again yet, but I have started writing and for now, that is all I need for now. For me, they are a “ two in one deal!”

Keep Dreaming Friends! I Loves you!

Day 2: Basic Things About MOI!

What can I say? My name is Alexis Plett. Married to my guy for 22 years in June ( wowsers)! We have two awesome boys who are 20 and 17. I won’t mention any names, Not now anyway. 🙂

That’s it! HA! That is definitely NOT 500 words. My identity has been wrapped around my kids and husband ,so to be honest, I don’t know ME very well. I have been on a quest to get to know me. A big part of my quest is understanding who I am in Christ. My faith is very important to me and I have had a major paradigm shift in the last couple years, especially. Luckily my husband is on the journey with me so we are together….but ALONE in many ways. It’s interesting. Something happens to Evangelical Christians when you tell them that GOD loves everyone and that Jesus died for everyone. I won’t get into that right now. I don’t want to make this about that right now, but we seem to be losing some friends over this new belief ( this new belief to US). It’s cray cray. So yes…I am trying to find out who this Alexis person is. When I know, I will introduce you

What do I love? Smart Food White Cheddar Popcorn, Pepsi Max and Hairspray Live. I am to the point that I will watch Hairspray Live after everyone is in bed so they don’t know or bug me about it. My family sometimes think I am crazy mad and maybe I am. I am sure I have seen the movie a million times. The same with Mamma Mia, Grease Live and Julie & Julia. I have been like this as far as I can remember. I remember when the song Life is a Highway by Tom Cochran came out. I played that song to death. I remember my roommates were ready to kill me. Lol I’m like that with foods too. I few years ago I was on a chicken fingers wrapped in a tortilla kick. That’s all I ate for a long time. It’s no wonder my youngest son has some of those qualities too. It sounds so weird. I sound weird.

My husband and I are both turning 49 this year. Yikes. Nervous I am. It sounds so old to me. I mean, for me to be that old, not others. I can hardly even believe it. Where has the time gone and what do I have to show for it. In some ways, I have lots…mainly my amazing boys. In some ways I have nothing…who am I? I don’t even know me! In some ways, why does it even matter… God is good and He has me on an amazing journey that will take me places I can’t even dream about. If I can dream about it, I don’t even want to go there which might give you a clue as far as tomorrow goes and my next topic. ” hint hint!”

Dream big friends! I loves you!

Day 1: Introduction to the Challenge

Day 1 for Camp NaNoWriMo

For this month I am blogging. My goal is to blog daily for the whole month of April. I also hope to blog at least 500 words per post and I am following a “list” that you can see in this post. 🙂 It is a list that I made up taking ideas off of other lists because to be honest, I love lists! One thing that I do not love though is long blogs so I am curious to see just how long 500 words is. I lose focus easy (  it seems ) so unless I am reading a book, I shy away from blogs that look long. Ok, if there are pictures in it and if I know you or have loved something else you have written, then, I “may” read a long blog. As a rule though, I don’t.

There are a few reasons that I chose to do Camp NaNoWrMo and actually I think that is a question for later in the month but I will share a reason now as well. Feb and March I did monthly Challenges. I did The Minimalism Game. It was good for me to be focused on something like that for the month and that is why I am here. I want to step up my game for writing ( and making sure I write daily). Some days are hard for me to write because of my depression. Even when I have something to say, I just can’t put it on paper ( or my screen). It’s a struggle but it’s life. I am hoping that I will be able to stay focused enough on writing everyday for this challenge that I can break through the depression. That’s my goal anyway.

I was filled with joy weeks ago that my writing seemed to have been revived once I quit Facebook. I am so so happy to say that it is still the case. I have had writers block literally for years. Which brings me up another reason I am here…to celebrate! My time for writing has come. My kids don’t need me hovering over them anymore and well, my husband…he does but one out of three isn’t bad. Lol

Camp NaNoWriMo is an extension from November’s NaNoWriMo. I believe there are two Camps; one in April and one in July. They encourage not only novels but other projects as well. I didn’t see where they had blogging listed but I thought that was what I wanted to do because that is what I am writing right now. It makes sense.

So here I am, Day 1 and almost 500 words ( 441 as of the first bracket). Good to know how long 500 words is. I know I can so this all month and I will, as well as other blogging as I so see fit.

Friends, have a wonderful April 1 ( and that is no joke!)

Do something that excites you today!!!! Make your inner child laugh. I loves you!