Day 6: Camp NaNoWriMo

Happy Saturday Friends! I’m writing a little late today today because for some reason I got caught up in cleaning a couple rooms in my house and organizing. You know how it goes Once it starts, you have no idea where it will end. I still have a stack of dishes to do and the floors. They will get done later this afternoon. Yesterday I shared about some podcasts I liked and today and I will finish it up. I will be sharing 7 with you that I listen to every week…usually. I guess that is 12 I listen to EVERY week and a whole bunch more I just pick and decide if and when I want to. Looking at all my screen shots, yeah, I do listen to a few of them. I listen to them when I do my housework and when I cook and bake. Sometimes I will take notes but actually, that is only for one. I bought a cute little speaker to use and I plan to buy a little bigger one next time and maybe even about 3 of them. One for the office, one for the kitchen and one for the bedroom or maybe I will keep this small one in the bedroom. Whatever, I think too much. Lol Let’s get going!!! Remember…these are in NO order.

Another Name For Everything is a podcast put on by the Center For Action and Contemplation. Richard Rohr, is being interviewed about his latest book, The Universal Christ, Chapter by Chapter. It is so good. I will be honest and say that I have a hard time reading Richard Rohr’s books because he is a complex writer, imo, but I love listening to him. He is so engaging and seems like such a kind man.

Ear Biscuits is a podcast by Rhett and Link of Good Mythical Morning fame on you tube. I love these guys and their banter. I love their you tube show and I love their podcast. They talk about a wide variety of stuff.

Ellen on the Go is podcast that is hosted by 4 producers of the Ellen show, Mary, Andy, Ed and Kevin. They basically go over the shows and share clips. They are so funny together and sometimes Ellen will be on it as well.

Imagined Life has got to my one of my VERY faves. Basically it talks about the life of someone famous in the first person, and you don’t know until the end who it is. There has been once I was able to guess before the end but that’s it. This is through Wondery, as is Ellen on the Go and Wondery has some great podcasts if you want to check them out. I just found a new one that talks about American Scandals. What can I say? Guilty pleasure. 🙂

Getting Curious with Jonathon Van Ness of Queer Eye. He had this podcast before Queer eye. He has a very curious mind and lots of questions and so his podcast topics and many many. He is fairly political and very clear about where he stands. I love that about him and the fact that his brain works so fast that he fits so many words in such a short time. I love people like that.

Let’s Explore, this is very new. There are four episodes. If you are very set in your Evangelical Christian views, I would suggest NOT listening to this but if you are curious and have questions, give it a listen . It is led by Lane McCall and he sits down with two pastors, Don Keathley and Darrin Begley. I hope they stay with this format and the same people. I love it so much and yes, it’s in line to what I believe. That’s why I love it so much. There are very few Christian podcasts that I can relate to anymore.

Last one and so awesome is No Crumbs Left. Teri is a foodie, just published a cook book called No Crumbs Left: Whole30 Endorsed, Recipes for Everyday Food Made Marvelous that will be out in May and is ready to be pre- ordered, and will soon he on tour. I LOVE her. Her podcasts include interviews with her awesome kids, teachers, authors and so many more, you name it. Topics such as parenting young kids to adult kids, divorce, memories, marriage, etc. She has an awesome Instagram. The best ever!!

There’s my list. If you happen to check one out, let me know what you think. Have a super evening friends, see you tomorrow!

Ttfn

Alexis

My Goals Are Worth Working For: Steve Austin

Day 5: Camp NaNoWriMo

Today I will talk about podcasts. I love podcasts a lot. There are some I listen to every week no matter what and there are others I hop around on, esp if I am just learning about them and there are so many to catch up on. In a way I would consider all the podcasts I listen to self-care because they make me happy to listen to them. Some are imperative for my mental health, some are great so I can laugh, some have really great religious deconstruction/construction, and some just give me great information for life and fun.

I will start with the podcasts that I listen to every week without fail. One of the very first podcasts I ever listened to was the Inglorious Pasterds. This podcast is what I would call my guilty pleasure. They have bad language and they can be very crude…YET…through this podcast and the honesty of these three men, two ex pastors and a worship leader ( Matt, Brad and Michael), and the amazing lineup of guests they have had on the podcast these last three years, I have learned so much. These guys have been a major part of my deconstruction and honestly, they make me laugh until I cry, every week and it feels so good.

The Business of Life with Jann Arden and Arlene Dickinson. This is so great. They cover so many topics and rabbit trails can go anywhere…it may be embarrassing for the male listeners sometimes. They are so good together. I look forward to the new episode every Saturday and have grown to appreciate these ladies much more!

The Holderness Family…you may know them from their You Tube channel about Christmas Jammies. Penn and Kim host it and they get some really great guests on it. They are brutally honest about their marriage, Kim’s depression and Penn’s ADD and the topics they cover are every day life.

Still Growing in Grace is fairly new. There are 10 Episodes. It is led by Mike Zenker who used to be the head of Grace Walk Canada, which has transitioned into Still Growing In Grace. Honest and amazing Truths about the grace of God…an amazing God who loves us all. Mike is enthusiastic about his beliefs and is a Pastor. Tune into his You Tube channel to hear his weekly messages from the pulpit. They are great.

Catching Your Breath by Steve Austin. I’ve talked about Steve before, in the other blogs. His podcast is awesome and very informative when it comes to mental health. It can get pretty heavy but that’s life and that’s healing. Tough stuff, but amazing. Steve is an ex pastor who almost died by suicide.

I’m going to end here with one more guilty pleasure and will do part 2 of podcasts tomorrow. I will link them all to their podcast site. American Greed. It’s based on the TV show. I saw the show for the first time in January while we were on holidays in a hotel room. We don’t have cable or anything here. It’s exactly what it sounds like, Americans that have been greedy and turn to crimes. It’s great listening if you are into that kind of thing. 🙂

I use the app Podcast Addict on my Android. So far, I have found every podcast I have looked for. I think it’s connected to itunes somehow. I don’t know how it works.

There you have it. If you listen to podcasts, what are your faves and why? I still have some more I listen to weekly, but like I said, I will share them tomorrow. Btw…these are in no particular order. Have a great Friday friends!

Ttfn

Alexis

My inner peace is unaffected by external triggers: Steve Austin

Day 4: Camp NaNoWriMo

I love Affirmations. I have used them everyday since Dec 31 and they come in so handy. What I need to do though is to put copies of them in the usual spots in my house so I will remember them better and say them more often. I usually get my affirmations on line and I also find a lot in guided meditations. If I really notice a lot in a meditation I will play it again later on and write the affirmations out. At the end of every month I write them out for the whole month and I clip them onto my gratitude journal and I put the month before on a ring. Surely it will come in handy some day.

I need to add though I write each affirmation in my gratitude day timer as well. I actually write them out twice at the beginning of the month. This is just the habit I have gotten into. To be honest, I don’t think I have truly gotten the best benefit out of them yet. I think that comes in posting them around my house so I remember them better. I will try that. I also need to point out that all of these I am doing I am not SWEARING by them. Meaning, they aren’t even close to becoming something I am worshiping or coming down on myself because I’m not getting enough out of it or I forget to do something that day or frankly, there are days I just don’t wanna…so I don’t or on those days I may MAKE myself just to push me. I have beaten myself up for too many years for not being good enough or not trying hard enough and I won’t do it anymore. I will do my best. If it isn’t working for me, I will change it or I will take time off from doing something to do something else or whatever I want.

I am enrolled in Catching Your Breath Academy. Our teacher is a life coach, named Steve Austin( not the wrestler), with an amazing story. He was a Pastor who almost died by suicide. He has several different courses. Some are free some aren’t. In fact, I think if you sign up now you get the first month free and $27/month. He has a different course every month. This month is Serenity, Self-Care and Self-Compassion. Last month was intense and quite triggering for me…dealing with fear, guilt and shame. It was crazy. I haven’t gotten into it as much this month but it’s good so far. I decided this year, I would dedicate it to healing for myself and I must say, on different levels I have come a very long way. I’m very encouraged by it. I will leave it at this. I linked Steve’s site so you can check it out for yourself if you want. I should add, the affirmations I am using this are from Steve and that’s what I’m posting at the end of these blogs.

Tomorrow I will talk about my very favorite app and well as podcasts…some self care ones and some that I just enjoying listening to. Have a super day my friends!

Ttfn

My Mind Is Evolving – Steve Austin

Day 3: Camp NaNoWriMo

Wed, April 3 and Day 3 of Camp Nano. I just want to explain the reason I mentioned that no one would care in my last blog , is because I found it to be a boring a blog. I didn’t want to write that day and I felt kind of blah. I guess it was obvious. 🙂

Today I will share about self-care. I will probably take a few days for this because I don’t like to make my blogs too long. I’m one who does not read long blogs so I choose to keep my own blogs shorter. First of all, what is self care? Basically it’s taking care of yourself, however that looks to you. Something I have learned is that we are individuals, and how one person may see and use self care is different than another person would. Self care is as different from one person to another as depression and anxiety are. We can learn a lot from each other as to how we use self care but what works for me, may not work for you and that’s ok. I have been pointing my self care in the direction of learning more about myself and who I am. I do this in several different ways and some examples of those are: meditation, online classes, podcasts, reconstructing my faith, movies, journalling to name some. The truth is, I haven’t done a lot of reading in the last few years. I love podcasts way more but maybe once I get a new Kindle, I will take up reading again. I have a lot of great books I need to read and don’t get me wrong, I do read them…just not a lot. In the next few days I will talk about podcasts I like, movies I watch to “get away from it all”, apps I use for self care and the different ways I journal. I will start with the beginning of the day.

Meditation; I am still trying to get into the habit of this. I’m finding it really hard. The initial “just do it part,” is hard. Once I get over it and I’m in the spare room meditating I love it. So basically, I have to get over myself and just do it. There are two apps that I have used for meditation. They are: Insight Timer and Calm. Calm was great for showing me how to meditate and then I didn’t use it as much. I like Insight Timer because there is more to choose without buying the app. I am leaning toward paying for the premium version of it though because I am intrigued by what it offers. When I talk to others who meditate, Calm is a very popular app. There are others out there t0o but these are the ones I have experience with. I am also part of a facebook group called Quantum Life with Steve McVey and Steve has a different meditation out every week. There is a monthly cost to be part of this group. He shares some pretty mind blowing stuff that could change your life.

I know some of my Christian friends will wonder “what in the world?” Yes, I do meditate and yes, it brings me peace. A lot has changed in my over the last few years about how I see God and it has caused issues. I can’t apologize for what I believe is right and for what is bringing me peace that I have never had. In fact, you will notice God is not mentioned in here at all until this paragraph. I think humans are way smarter than we give them credit for and that we can learn a lot from each other. I also don’t think that Christians have all the answers. I will leave this quote with you from Queer Eye:

You can’t evangelize and antagonize at the same time-Mama Tammye

You can see more if you watch Queen Eye on Netflix, Season 2 Episode 1. I encourage you to watch it. My faith is still very important to me, it just looks different, feels different and is way more inclusive. To me, that makes sense.

I will end this day with one more app I use in the morning. It is called 365 Gratitude. I really liked it a lot so I bought the full version of it. I use it in the morning to write three things that I am grateful for. It asks your mood and has some great retrospect. I just really like it. It has worked will for me.

I will leave it here for now and tomorrow I will talk about affirmations. SPOILER: I LOVE affirmations! Have a great day friends. If you have any questions about the apps I have shared just let me know. Also, what apps do you use for meditation and gratitude? Share your insights here if you want to.

Ttfn

Alexis

My Spirit Is Grounded: Steve Austin

Day 2: Camp NaNoWriMo

Day 2 and already, I don’t have much to say. That’s why a plan is always good. I’m feeling on the blah side so that doesn’t help. We did get out and about today. Wally found some tires so he can smear the horse poop in the pasture so he will pick them up tomorrow AND we found a great place for Bubble Tea. It was so good and I’m looking forward to trying different flavors. We discovered Bubble Tea in Winnipeg. I had had it before but it was a long time ago and I was pleasantly surprised Wally liked it so much too.

The farrier is coming next week to trim Daisy’s hooves. I’m pretty sure she will have to go in the Jenny Craig pen. It’s so funny because that is what they call it around here when your horse is a little to heavy and you need to limit what she eats, whether it’s the hay and oats/barley or the grass. Someone got a little too spoiled over the winter months and ate too much delicious hay. Sounds like most humans I know. Lol We love our farrier. She has been so patient with us as we have learned more about Daisy. Trish (our farrier) actually taught Wally how to bridle up Daisy and ride her. It’s still weird to me that we have a horse. Daisy is blind in one eye and we are considering getting her a donkey to keep her company. We have some research to do before that happens though.

I think I might get some information together and share what kind of self-care I am doing. Surely no one cares, but it is something to write about, right? One thing I do everyday are Affirmations. I have a new one everyday and at the end of these blogs I will share them with you. I have been doing this since January using it along with my gratitude journal. I will share more about this tomorrow though.

Sorry for the boring blog. Lol I’m sure there will be more like this but hopefully some will be exciting. Have a super evening friends! Love to you all!

Alexis

Peace Reigns in My Heart : Steve Austin

Day 1: Camp NaNoWriMo

Today is the first day of camp NaNoWriMo. My plan is to blog everyday and I made a list of questions as an outline to follow. Ugh. I’m not really happy with the questions as of today, so I will have to try to come with some different ones. I guess I can do some writing prompts or I can just ad-lib as I go. I’ll try that today!

I’m so happy we are now in April. Spring is here with some snow every once in a while. That is Alberta living. One way we know it is Spring, are the bees. We live across the street from a bee farm. They put the hives out around this time of year(a couple days ago). Within a half an hour some had made their way over here already. They like to hang out at out back deck where the sun shines the most. They are still sleepy and slow and are quite annoying. By the time it gets warmer out, they are usually gone and then back again in the Fall when it is getting cooler and they need out nice warm deck again.

Another way Spring showed it’s arrival was seeing a moose out in the field enjoying some grubs. Daisy, our horse, was pretty worked up. The moose wasn’t too far from her. We do have moose living in the our bushes but we don’t see them that much so it was so cool to see one this year. I hope we see more. I would love to see a baby moose.

Spring mud. Not my favorite thing. We have three dogs. I was able to find something to block them from coming into the kitchen and just hang out in the porch until their feet are dry. I hate mopping the floor several times a day because of mud. I realize it’s part of season but like I said, with dogs…ANNOYING!

One thing I love about Spring is that it seems so new. The growth of new life, whether it’s the new grass coming up or buds on the trees to hearing the baby coyotes at night and seeing other baby wildlife if they dare show themselves. I’ve always seen Spring as a time for introspection for myself too. It’s kind of cool that at the start of this month the course I will be taking at Catching Your Breath Academy is called Serenity, Self-Care and Self-Compassion. Last month’s course was pretty heavy and it was called Taking the Gloves Off: Learning to Fight Fear, Shame and Guilt. I was triggered pretty bad through it but I made it through to the other side and achieved some pretty amazing feats because of it. Maybe someday I will share. New life reminds me of being good to myself, to be gentle with myself. If you are anything like me, I tend to me my own worse critic. I’m learning though to change my thoughts and to see the truth for what it is, rather than allow the recording in my head from things gone by to control me. It’s really hard work being intentional about healing. Some days you may find that you just can’t do it. I allow that now, without feeling guilty, but I don’t allow myself to live in it. So much of my time has been wasted with anxiety and depression. I choose healing and I choose it without medication. For me, that is what is best, otherwise I won’t work through my issues. I know myself pretty well.

All this to say, Spring is here and I’m very happy about it.

ttfn

Alexis

Time Alone Encourages Me To Listen To My Inner Voice: Steve Austin

You Are Worth Standing Up For

The Story: She was in the shower listening to a podcast. She couldn’t tell how loud it was, she was in the shower. She hears dogs barking and she hears her husband yelling, assuming, at the dogs. Next think you know the bathroom door opens...YOU ARE IN THERE? Yes I am. DIDN’T YOU HEAR ANYTHING? I heard dogs barking. I WAS YELLING AT YOU FROM THE COUCH. Door slams. Another Door slams. She finishes her shower, thinking about what had just happened. “What the hell did I do?” she asks herself. Now she’s mad realizing that her husband was yelling at her from the couch like she was a dog or something. She comes out of the shower. What the hell what that about? Your speaker was too loud. It’s ok now though, it’s good now. You had no right yelling at me from the couch. You could have come and asked me to turn it down. Yes. I know. She fumes in hatred of herself because she didn’t say more. She goes over and over in her mind “should I apologize for having it too loud?” But the other voice in her head says, “no. You didn’t do anything wrong”. The energy is heavy. Forgiveness must happen on her part or she will fume all week about it. He was a fucking jerk but she is considering apologizing. She is worth more than that. Forgiveness is a must, to get over the anger toward him, but apologizing…no. I don’t blame her one bit.

This story pissed me off because it very much could have been my household and I would have reacted exactly the same way. How do you come out of a space of self hate and worthlessness to a place of truly believing you are worth standing up for? THAT my friends, is the journey I am on.

Tough Stuff!

TTFN